what is marriage?

during dinner, my buddy was asking some of us:
"you have been married for years with no kids.
one day, you find that the marriage is monotonous.
you realised you find your colleague/new friend very attractive & special.
he/she is the special someone who adds spice to your boring life.
would you choose to salvage your dying marriage or have an affair?"

some of us said:
"go for marriage counseling" "go for the affair" "tell your partner of this special person you've met. ask him/her if he/she finds the marriage dying."

there is no wrong or right to their answers.
in my point of view, a marriage is sacred.
it is about finding the right person & being the right person.
i marry the person because i want to spend the rest of my life with him.
he is the one to build a warm family with me.
he is the one to father our kids.
we are there for each other in moments of ups & downs.
to substain a marriage, it takes more than just love & effort.
you need commitment, understanding, togetherness, unselfishness, communication.
it is crucial to love the person as who as he/she is & NOT how you want him/her to be.
we have to constanly remind ourselves how in the 1st place we fall in love with our partners.
it could be his silly faces to make you laugh, his lame jokes (you are the only one who finds it funny), his extra efforts to pick the yucky green peas or corn out of your dishes, his caring, sensitive side that is only revealed to you..
any daily routine will make life boring.
how could we take that as an excuse that the special someone you met recently will be the party of your new life?
it is wrong!
there is no dying love.
the only thing that is dying is the faith in yourself.
what happen to the wedding vow that both of you have recited?
“For it is my solemn vow that in the name of God, I, take you to be my lawfully wedded husband/wife, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to have and to hold from this day forward, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death.”

there is always something new to discover about your husband/wife.
take the time out to explore & rediscover each other.
learn a new dance, song, hobby, sport together.
give each other breathing spaces, be thoughtful, sincere & sensitive to each other's needs.

there is no perfect person in this world but i'm willingly to love that one special imperfect man's imperfections.

quote of Barnett Brickner
"Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate."

i hope that my friends will meet their special someone & have blissful marriages.
have faith in yourselves. love will blossom.

Christina Aguerila - These Are The Special Times
Oh yeah, oh
In these moments, moments of our lives
All the world is ours
And this world is so right
You and I sharing this time together, oh
Sharing the same dream
As time goes by, we will find

These are the special times
Times we'll remember
These are the precious times
The tender times, we'll hold in our hearts forever
These are the sweetest times
These times together
And through it all one thing will always be true
The special times are the times I share with you

Mmm, oh yeah
With each moment, moment passing by
We'll make memories that will last our whole lives
As you and I travel through time together, oh yeah
Living this sweet dream
And every day we can say

These are the special times
Times we'll remember
These are the precious times
The tender times, we'll hold in our hearts forever
These are the sweetest times
These times together
And through it all one thing will always be true
The special times are the times I share with you

These tender moments
When heaven is so close
These are the moments that I know

These are the special times
Times we'll remember
These are the precious times, the tender times
We'll hold in our hearts forever
These are the sweetest times
These times together
And through it all one thing will always be true
Oh yeah, yeah

The special times are the times I share
The special times are the times we share
The special times are the times I share with you
Ooh yeah
(These are the special times)
Yeah, yeah
(Special times)
Yeah, ooh
(These are the special times)
Oh, oh
(These are the special times)