a big joke

that heaven is playing on me.

this krn guy expresses his interest in me.
asking me to go over to seoul soon.
i can work & study there.
he is not aware of the relationship problems i'm facing here, though he knows i'm attached.
well.. i WAS attached.
i'm now single but on the way to make the relationship work again.
through a very painful method.

to him, i love Kr alot and it has been a huge interest to me.
he will teach me krn & i will help him with english.
to me, he is like an older brother.

the guy whom i love so much is forcing me to give up all krn related things.
this guy here, who is a native krn, is encouraging me to go to Seoul.
i know he will embrace my likes with open arms.
i can watch, listen to my interest openly...
live the life-style i have always wanted to live...

*smirk*
how pathetic my life is.
entangle in this mess.
a tricky, sticky mess that i can't seem to get myself out of it.

why is heaven playing such a cruel joke on me?